I dreamed about going to an AirBnB as we are changing on the road in a car. At the AirBnB it’s a two-story one bedroom apartment with two rooms. As I come out of the bathroom I need to change my pants, and the woman, the owner of the apartment enters so I duck into the bathroom or side room upstairs to finish changing. As I exit the room to face her she looks at me and says “yes this is nice”. And we embrace for a hug, a very comforting hug. We move to her living room and I begin to accommodate her. I notice there is a walker in the living room, she’s playing around on it, saying something about escaping from an elderly persons home, and not having an identity, then she leads me downstairs into her apartment. Talks about something else and wants me to press up against her again. I’m pushing her onto the door frame and getting a feel for her. Then we go back upstairs and again I press on her, she seems to be playing some type of games with me, and as I again try to embrace her on the wall, that is on the door frame, she says to me-“I want eggplant”, then looks at me coyly. I’m turned on in my dream by this type of attention. However she refuses my advances ultimately. ( I was extremely surprised by Barbara Lindsey, who called me as I was typing this up. My initial instinct was to reach out to Xavier, I have not spoke to him in a few weeks) .I never go through any of the doors into the room that isn’t the living room with this woman, all the rooms are darkly lit and I see them off to the side so I don’t immediately think to pull her into one of those rooms and am instead following her around. I don’t realize that I was giving away my control of my self instead of assessing the situation, Whatever it was supposed to be is always my decision. Not reacting to the needs or desires of this older woman or any woman.

Identity is one of my trigger words

Prior to entering that AirBnB I was driving around with a stack of money put up next to my ear while another individual was walking and he was flashing out money. It didn’t seem like I was driving the vehicle however I didn’t notice any other driver. ( when Barbara called she just mentioned the networking conference however she called me on Google voice, video chat, I’m accusing to see my face however her screen was dark, I should have called back when I prepared, that surprised me)

The individual walking had a bomber vest on and dreads as well as glasses. I believe I was in some type of exotic car. It seems like I was by the train tracks in Douglasville.

When external stimuli comes my way I should not react, however I should not freeze, it’s a clever balance, like playing the orchestra or my souls instrument to fight, fly, or freeze/pause and think. All of these dynamics most certainly happen within 4 secs, or the length of a telephone ring.

This dream woman was older, darker skin tone, not old enough to be in a senior home I believe and had dirty blond hair

I did the same thing in real life that I did in my dream just now. When that call came in from Barbara Lindsey I just jumped and reacted same as in my dream, I’m reacting. That parallel just opened my mind- there’s a boundary problem here.